Jedward appeared on Never Mind The Buzzcocks last night, and were, obviously, the subject of much ridicule. Nothing wrong there you might think. After all, Simon Amstell's period hosting the music quiz was much lauded for Amstell's mocking of guests.
The thing with Amstell was that you always felt a) it was founded in truth and b) the guests deserved it. When, for example, he tried to stage an intervention to save Amy Winehouse from drink and drugs no-one thought "oh that's out of line, the girl has clearly never been near anything stronger than a paracetamol". As a c), and this is probably the most important point, Amstell was actually funny.
The quality of the jokes about Jedward last night can be embodied in the words "shut" and "up". Yes, that's right, Jedward are noisy. So having people tell them to "shut up" is hilarious, right? The joke was dragged out to the extent that as part of the missing lyrics round someone had spent time researching songs with the words "shut up" in them. Is that seriously the best joke about Jedward that a team of adult comedy writers could muster?
What riled us (and made us waffle an entire post on it) is that criticism leveled at Jedward is founded on the notion that they are pop stars and they can't sing. We're not disputing their musical prowess (although we'd build a defense on an 'entertainment' level), but the irony is that on a show boasting 5 guests who would list 'comedian' as their profession Buzzcocks was simply not funny.
If we're pointing the finger at people who can't do the job they're supposed to surely Katy Brand and Charlie Higson (the one from the Fast Show that is not Paul Whitehouse and is is not Ron Weasley's dad) should be right at the very top of the list.
The show also demonstrated what the alternative to Jedward is. Step forward Eliza Doolittle (never has a name been more apt). She declared at the opening of the show that she would never go on X Factor because she writes her own material. OH FUCK OFF. This is where all this 'integrity' bollocks really grates on us. Doolittle was so inconsequential that the reflection of the lights on the studio floor was more interesting than her.
The fact that two teenage boys with funny hair were given twice as much air time as six other so called entertainers kind of embodies our point. Jedward are not supposed to be the next musical messiahs. They are entertainment. Vacuous and frivolous perhaps, but entertainment nonetheless. And in that capacity they deliver in abundance.
Anyway, we're sure everyone got paid and no-one really gives a toss. It's just sad that grown adults who are useless at their own jobs are allowed to go on national television and make fun of two teenagers having a good time. Apparently that is comedy. RIP Simon Amstell.
*Dismounts high horse and strops off to listen to some Puccini*